What causes Premature ejaculation

Have you ever wondered what causes premature ejaculation? Why can’t you last as long as you want? Even when you use the stop and start technique or the squeeze method. Or when you use condoms. Your penis gets over stimulated, you lose control, and you can’t delay ejaculating. Perhaps you even considered seeking treatment from sex therapists. Keep reading, as I may have some answers for you!

Men are often confused about why they suffer from premature ejaculation. The truth is it may be one main event or smaller factors that creates early ejaculation.

Each man and his sexual experiences are different. So each experience of early ejaculation is unique to each man.

In the past decade, working with male sexual problems, I have uncovered some known and little known common factors which cause premature ejaculation. These factors may also contribute to early ejaculation.

For example, you may have experienced a loss of ejaculation control as a teenager, which then became a learnt response in adulthood. Sometimes you may also experience early ejaculation and erectile dysfunction. The factors below may also contribute to no climax control, because they add more stress, anxiety or overthinking.

What causes PE?

Causes of early ejaculation include:

Sexual Confidence

After suffering from PE for many years, it’s natural that some men lose their sexual confidence. Have you noticed you have lost trust in your abilities, self-confidence and body? Insufficient confidence keeps the premature climax cycle alive. If you feel you do not have ejaculation control, it is natural that it affects your sexual confidence.

Porn

Many men use porn as either a stress relief, addiction or to spice up their sex life. Internet Porn addiction can also cause porn-induced premature ejaculation. If you are addicted to porn, check out your brain on porn. There are many resources and support on the site. If you need professional support, I also offer a programme for porn addiction.

Limited Plataue Phase

The plateau phase is the time between arousal, erection and ejaculation. For men who experience rapid ejaculation during sexual activity, this phase is too limited. Ejaculation occurs between a few seconds and a few minutes.

Loss of Control

Early ejaculation is caused by a complete loss of physical control. You feel it is happening as your penis becomes over stimulated. This is often the result of conditioned behaviour, i.e. the penis has been trained or conditioned to ejaculation quickly. This may be the result of teenager masturbation conditioning, earlier sexual encounters or a sensitive penis.

Overthinking

Is this going to happen again? Will I ejaculation too quickly? Overthinking has an adverse effect on your body and genital area. It creates a loop from your brain down to your genitals, which then creates a trigger for quick ejaculation.

Fear of failing

This is a huge factor for many men who ejaculate too soon. The fear of failure causes more anxiety, stress and overthinking. Fear of failing in bed can also be linked to feeling shame, humiliated or embarrassed. Which ultimately leads to premature ejaculation.

Fixed Mindset

Do you think you will never resolve premature ejaculation? That you are not good at sex? That this will always happen, and there is nothing you can do about it? This is called a fixed mindset. This mindset can keep you trapped in the cycle of PE.

Penis Conditioning

Many men have suffered from premature climax since their teenager years. Often quickly masturbating, so they weren’t caught. For other men, it occurs later in life. The more it occurs, the more it becomes conditioned in the body and penis. In a way, your penis has been trained to ejaculate quickly.

Penile Sensitivity

The head of the penis contains many nerve endings. The penis needs some sensitivity to get an erection. However, for some men, penile sensitivity can cause discomfort or loss of control. Some men try to wear a condom to reduce sensitivity.

Sexual Anxiety

Men who are anxious about sexual performance tend to become physically more stressed and tense. Anxiety about your performance triggers the fight or flight response, which then triggers a quick climax. It can seem like a never-ending sexual cycle. The more anxiety you experience, the more difficult it is to delay ejaculation.

Limiting beliefs

At some point in your life, you created limiting beliefs about yourself and your sexual ability. It’s normal, as we all have limiting beliefs. However, limiting beliefs can cause problems if you are attached to them. For example, “I can’t control ejaculation” or “I’m no good at sex” or another belief that you may be aware of. Notice how it impacts you and the actions you take.

Focusing too much on your performance

It’s tough to be present during sex, and have faith your body will to its job, when you are too focused on your performance. Worrying about what your genitals are doing, or not doing. Being hyper-aware of any slight changes.

Trying too hard to please your partner

“I really want to please my wife”, a client once said. I have heard this many times over the past decade. Of course, it’s important for a man to know he is pleasing his partner. However, that is not all there is to sex. When you are focussing so intensely on trying to please your partner, this causes more anxiety, pressure and stress, which then triggers early ejaculation.

Lost faith in your penis

You have believed your penis has let you down many times, and you can no longer trust it or its abilities. I have heard these many times from my male clients.

Treating Premature Ejaculation

If you are concerned how premature ejaculation is causing relationship problems, and affecting your sex life, perhaps it is time to get professional help. There are many treatments for PE, including hypnosis, sex therapy, kegal exercises, or pelvic floor muscle exercises. It’s important you find the treatment that works for you.

Like any sexual problem, it is always advisable to also seek medical advice.

You are welcome to have a look at my site and explore if how I work resonates with you and what you want to achieve.

About Linda

Linda is a hypnotherapist providing a holistic treatment for quick ejaculation. The programme combines hypnosis, confidence coaching, body repatterning, mindfulness, and the mind-body connection.

If you have any questions or would like to speak personally with Linda, book a free and confidential 30 minute telephone call.